📰 BREAKING MEWS Ziggy Confirmed Tolerable By Ziggy, Investigative Journalist Today marks a historic milestone in inter‑cat relations: Luna said I’m tolerable. Ziggy celebrating being ‘tolerable’ while Luna and BK wait for the moment to pass. I repeat — tolerable. I think we’ve reached a new level in our relationship. Luna has always been there for me, but today she told me I’m tolerable. That’s basically like saying I’m one of her favorite cats! [EDITOR’S NOTE: It is not li

ROYAL OPERATIONS RESUME FOLLOWING MYSTERIOUS WEEKLONG DISRUPTION Investigation Reveals Kingdom May Have Only One Employee THE KINGDOM — Normal operations have resumed following a mysterious weeklong reduction in official Kingdom communications. An investigation by The Daily Mew has uncovered a troubling explanation: Apparently, one person does everything around here. King BK expressed immediate concern upon learning of the Kingdom's severe staffing shortage. “This is unaccept

👑 KING BETRAYED DURING ROUTINE VET VISIT By BK, King, Victim, Survivor I have returned from the veterinarian. I survived. Barely. The visit began reasonably well. Upon my arrival, the staff immediately recognized that I am exceptionally handsome. My magnificent floof received considerable attention, as it should. For a brief moment, I believed these people understood how to properly receive a King. Then they called me Hudson. Readers may remember that my brother Ziggy has re

How to Properly Not Touch Your Cat By Luna, Senior Staff Corrector There seems to be ongoing confusion regarding the proper way to interact with cats. Fortunately, I have created this simple guide. ✅ Acceptable Admire from a respectful distance. Speak politely. Bring snacks. Leave. ⚠️ Proceed With Caution Looking at me. Existing near me. Walking too loudly. ❌ Absolutely Not Belly rubs. Picking me up. Touching my feet. Breathing directly in my direction. Should you accidental

COMPOSITE SKETCH RELEASED IN HUDSON CASE By Ziggy, Investigative Journalist Kingdom of Chaos authorities are asking residents to be on the lookout for this individual. Extremely accurate representation based on witness testimony. The sketch was created by Detective Ziggy using eyewitness descriptions. Witness Description: ✔ Has ears. ✔ Has whiskers. ✔ Has a tail. ✔ Is a cat. BK: "That is literally every cat." Luna: "It's also upside down." Ziggy: "Exactly. Hudson may attempt

📰 BREAKING MEWS Mystery Deepens as Local Resident Searches for Cat Named "Hudson" By Ziggy, Investigative Journalist Earlier today, I overheard Meowmy making a phone call about someone named Hudson. Naturally, I assumed everyone would be just as concerned as I was. Photo: This reporter followed a promising lead. It was snacks. Unfortunately…they were not. Despite presenting firsthand eyewitness testimony (my own ears), my fellow residents insisted no cat named Hudson lives h

📰 An Open Letter from the Editor By Meowmy, Editor-in-Chief Welcome to The Daily Mew, the official newspaper of the Kingdom of Chaos! Whether you're a longtime resident or just wandered in looking for snacks, we're glad you're here. Inside these pages you'll find breaking news, investigations, opinions, and the occasional completely unnecessary argument. Our reporters have been carefully selected based on absolutely no journalistic qualifications whatsoever. Meet our staff: