Issue #0004: How to Properly Not Touch Your Cat
- Luna
- Aug 6
- 1 min read
How to Properly Not Touch Your Cat
By Luna, Senior Staff Corrector
There seems to be ongoing confusion regarding the proper way to interact with cats.
Fortunately, I have created this simple guide.
✅ Acceptable
Admire from a respectful distance.
Speak politely.
Bring snacks.
Leave.
⚠️ Proceed With Caution
Looking at me.
Existing near me.
Walking too loudly.
❌ Absolutely Not
Belly rubs.
Picking me up.
Touching my feet.
Breathing directly in my direction.
Should you accidentally violate these guidelines, corrective slaps may be administered without warning.
You're welcome.
Editors Note:
BK: I disagree with several of these points.
Luna: This article was not written for everyone.
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